so idk if its just me or what but saying goodbye this time was way easier, i think its part cause i did it before and i knew what to expect and i knew what things not to think about so that i wouldent get all upset and what not and part because i turned down the emotions dial im so happy still able to do that i have manipulated my emotions in a while i was kinda worried i wasnt gonna be able to do it but it just all came back to me. so i think im gonna keep them turned down for the semester not gonna torture myself like i did all last semster cant have that happen again the whole being depressed and shit that shit just aint me ive been doing alota things that are outa my character with this girl most of them arent bad and i dont mind but this whole missing her like crazy shit and being depressed and letting her hold me back like i did last semester thats not happening this semester, so im turning down the emotional dial a hell of alot and bring out a little bit of the old me not the relationship endangering part like the nubers game or anything its just the extra parts that are needed for me to be able to keep my emotions in check.
i find amazing how far ive come, if you told me a couple years ago this is where id be now i wouldent believe you hell if you told me a couple months ago this is where id be i wouldent have believed you. im one of those people now you know the relationship people and no matter how disgusting that thought is to me thats what i am now and i really dont mind it. like i realized im up here over 200 miles away from her and theres quality females all around me and guess what theyre not temptation like i see some really nice quality walk by and im just like ok thats nice good for u whatever wow wtf happened to me. oh well i dont mind too much
so umm yeh 9 weeks. i say bring it on.
umm yeh thats all i have for right i think thats enough dont you?....
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